Yes, where is the elixir this guy drank, I want some of it. From Environmental Graffiti we get the following story “Bodyshock: The Amazing Story behind the 256 Year-Old Man“.
Li Ching-Yun was reported to have buried 23 wives and fostered 180 descendants by the time he died at the age of 256.
Wow, let’s see. If we assume he started getting married at 16 years old, that gives him 240 years, divided by 23 wives, you get an average of 10.43 years per wife. 180 descendants divided by 23 wifes gives us an average of 7.82 children per wife. Wow! Was he part of the Church of the Later Day Saints? What was his secret?
Keep a quiet heart, sit like a tortoise, walk sprightly like a pigeon and sleep like a dog.
Apparently, for over one hundred years, Li continued selling his own herbs and then subsequently sold herbs collected by others. He also (according to Time) had six-inch long fingernails on his right hand.
Shit, six inch fingernails! If that’s not proof enough, I don’t know what those damn skeptics are looking for.
The detail, which seems to prove both arguments and debunk them at the same time, is Li’s youthful appearance, noted in a 1928 article from the New York Times. Visually and physically, he appeared to look like a typical 60 year-old. Does this therefore signify a superhuman body capable of lasting one quarter of a millennium, or is the story of Li Ching-Yun based on a series of half-truths, lies or exaggerations?
Unfortunately, we may never know. You may draw your own logical conclusions.
Logical Conclusion: There is only one logical conclusion. Fortunately we do know. He was not 256 you moron, he was 60, just as old as he looked it. Every other conclusion is illogical and pretty stupid.
Yet another logical conclusion: Don’t look to Environmental Graffiti for any serious journalism.
So says, Mr. Zaitsev of the Institute of Radio Engineering and Electronics in Moscow, Russia. According to this fruit cake:
No matter how quiet we try to be now it’s too late to prevent alien invaders.
For 40 years, astronomers have fired microwaves off objects to chart near-Earth space and track the movement of close asteroids – and these signals are traceable back to us.
Should I sell everything I have and go hide in a cave somewhere?